Thursday, May 17, 2012

The Secret Society of Mothers Who Adopt Children From China

There’s a secret society that most people don’t know about. Sometimes even its members don’t realize they belong for weeks, months or even years after joining. it’s just that secret.

It’s the Secret Society of Mothers Who Adopt Children From China.

You see, once you have adopted a child from China, you pretty much belong, although you are often unaware that it exists or that you are even a member. But you are.

There are signs that you are a member. You looks at other families with Caucasian/Asian make up similar to your own and give them a knowing glance. You strike up conversations and share intimate stories with people you have never met simply because their kid looks like yours.

There is a connection between adoptive mothers. We almost always seem to click at some level, almost instantaneously. There is a comfort in being a member of this secret society. A kinship. A feeling that you know that you don’t ever have to explain why your family looks a little different or why your child still suffers from emotional scars left with them early in their lives. Other members know these things without explanation.

I was lucky enough to have a random meeting with another society member when Sam when in the hospital. In the room right next door to ours was an adorable little almost-six-year-old girl who was also having a cleft related surgery. Her name was Imerie. Imerie’s mother Valerie and I became instant friends.

The friendship strengthened outside the hospital, as my new friend was able to offer me support and encouragement when Sam’s surgery failed. 

The friendship grew even more when Molly, Sam and I met Imerie and Valerie at the hospital for a post op follow up appointment.

The only bad part about our friendship is that Valerie and Imerie live several states away! Sniff Sniff. No worries though, we have plans for various other meetings throughout the years. You just can’t keep us Secret Society members apart!

Imarie and Molly playing at the hospital.IMG_7446

Sam’s hoping to get the all clear from the surgeon so we can remove his arm restraints.IMG_7448

The girls goofing around while waiting for an appointment.IMG_7451

Sam finally has his free!IMG_7454

And can eat crunchy food again!IMG_7455

When we got back to the car, I removed the restraints and handed Sam pretzels rods. He threw his arms ups and shouted “Hooray!” Well, actually he shouted “Ooh-ay!” but the look on his face made the word seem perfectly clear!

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